Randalin skrev:
Nu är du värd ... ja, det som du helst unnar dig när du är värd att unna dig det du vill unna dig när du är värd det.
För det är du!
Tack!
Jo, jag minns att du inte var så förtjust i halvrimmen! Men att rimmen är lite halvdana är inte dåligt hantverk utan avsiktligt av Tolkien. Så om jag skulle ha lyckats med underverket att få till hela rim överallt så hade det faktiskt varit en sämre översättning! Tom Shippey skriver en del om det där i sin
The Road to Middle-earth. (Min fetstil. Och Shippeys omfattande kursivering i exemplen utelämnad pga utmattning.
)
Tom Shippey skrev:
The rhymes are obvious, on lines 2 and 4, 6 and 8 – '-nien/ney in', 'made/laid'. The internal rhymes however operate not between even lines but between odd and even, 1 and 2, 3 and 4, and so on. They are furthermore not on the ends of words but in the middle: 'mariner/tarried in', 'timber felled/Nimbrethil', 'silver fair/silver were', 'like a swan/light upon'. Nor are they always complete. One might note that the full rhymes are similarly not always exact, some of them being 'masculine', i.e. on one syllable only, but some 'feminine', on more than one syllable, and tending towards similarity rather than identity, as in 'Arvernien/journey in', 'armoured him/harm from him', 'helmet tall/emerald', etc. These are too common to be the result of incapacity, and they are furthermore reinforced by the unpredictable but frequent use of the other devices of sound: alliteration in 'light laid', 'shining shield', 'ward all wounds', etc., alliterative assonance in 'sails of silver', 'Night of Naught', 'sight ... he sought' and 'boat it bore with biting breath'. Typically, in between there are such doubtful cases as 'built a boat' – just alliteration, or assonance as well? – while over the whole poem there lies a web of grammatical repetitions and variations, also never quite exact – 'her sails (he wove) of silver fair/of silver (were) her lanterns (made)', or later 'his sword (of steel) was valiant/(of adamant) his helmet tall'.
Describing the technique is difficult, but its result is obvious: rich and continuous uncertainty, a pattern forever being glimpsed but never quite grasped. In this way sound very clearly echoes or perhaps rather gives the lead to sense. Just as the rhymes, assonances and phrasal structures hover at the edge of identification, so the poem as a whole offers romantic glimpses of 'old unhappy far-off things' (to cite Wordsworth), or 'magic casements opening on the foam/Of periolus seas, in faery lands forlorn' (to remember Keats).